Have you ever wished you could live in an earlier, more romantic era?

Ladies, welcome to the 19th century, where there's arsenic in your face cream, a pot of cold pee sits under your bed, and all of your underwear is crotchless. (Why? Shush, dear. A lady doesn't question.)

Unmentionable is your hilarious, scandalously honest (yet never crass) guide to the secrets of Victorian womanhood, giving you detailed advice on:

• What to wear
• Where to relieve yourself
• How to conceal your loathsome addiction to menstruating
• What to expect on your wedding night
• How to be the perfect Victorian wife
• Why masturbating will kill you
• And more

Irresistibly charming, laugh-out-loud funny, Unmentionable will inspire a whole new level of respect for Elizabeth Bennett, Scarlett O'Hara, Jane Eyre, and all of our great-great-grandmothers.

(And it just might leave you feeling ecstatically grateful to live in an age of pants, superabsorbency tampons, epidurals, antidepressants, and not dying of the syphilis your husband brought home.)